*Disclaimer: This post contains adult language. I use it to drive a point. If the use of this type of language offends you, please don’t read it.
Are any of my readers Bones fans? If you happen to be, then you know that Monday night was absolutely INSANE. I have a fellow Bones maniac at church, my dear dear friend (I call her Angie and she calls me Bones). Since her cell phone is on the fritz, we generally Facebook each other during the episode to share our mutual excitement and anguish.
Last night, after the season finale, I had no words (and, mind you, I still find no way to describe my sentiments other than what I came up with last night). What did I come up with, you ask?
HOLY F*CKING SHIT.
That’s right. I swore.
Are you judging me?
I acknowledge that my choice of language was rather salty and perhaps better suited to a private message than to a comment on a wall post. I could have thought it through a little bit more.
I’m not one for using expletives in every sentence. I believe that, like any word, overuse makes the word itself obsolete. Being a writer, I like to use words to their greatest effect. I like to find the right words to express myself. Last night, and still now, those are truly the only words I had to accurately depict how I was reacting to events on a show that I really am emotionally invested in, however sad that may be.
So when I have someone publicly criticize me for it in a passive-aggressive, I’m-superior manner, I have trouble containing my anger. She’s lucky I didn’t write back, because I would have cut her to ribbons. Instead, I am addressing, very openly, my thoughts on the subject of swearing.
*How’s that for the longest introduction in the history of ever?
On the subject of swearing, like I said, I believe that they are not words that should be used every two syllables. But I apply that principle to most other words, as well. If you hear me say a word more than twice in ten minutes, you’ll probably also hear an apology once I realize what I’ve said.
Words are power. They should be used effectively, and with wisdom.
With that said, I believe there is sometimes a certain wisdom in cursing. Depending on how it is used, of course. There isn’t wisdom in swearing in front of children. There isn’t wisdom in swearing to look cool. There isn’t wisdom in using the name of Jesus in order to express your anger.
They are words. “Fuck” is a word, and I do use it. “Shit” is a word, and I do use it. I have limits, though. I won’t address someone by a curse. I won’t call someone a “cunt.” For the most part, if I’m not incredibly angry or insulted, I refer only to myself as a “bitch.” “Whore” is not a word you will hear come out of my mouth, and certainly not when speaking of a person. I won’t yell, “Jesus Christ!”
I use cursing to express myself. To express how I’m feeling. And I don’t feel curse words all that often. But when I do, I’m not going to hide it. I’m not going to shut it away behind closed doors. I am human – I have feelings that cannot be expressed through a cutesie “gee willikers!” I have feelings that simply cannot be expressed. Sometimes the closest I come is a bear hug, or tears, or a kiss. Other times, it’s a well-placed, shocking, seldom-heard “Fuck!”
If you disagree with that, I won’t be on your case. I won’t force you to say words you don’t want to say. And I’d ask you not to rebuke me on a public forum, as if you were my mother, as if you were beyond reproach. As if you were better than me. If you truly feel it to be an inappropriate use of language in the context (for which, I might add, you do need to know the context), then send me a private message, and I’ll be much more inclined to review my use of language.
Isn’t this addressed in the bible? Does not Matthew, in Chapter 18, give us direction in this?
“If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over.”
So please. I have nothing against honest rebuke, when done in love and in an appropriate manner. But otherwise, I will not respond well, if I respond at all.
And just know that I am fully aware of the impact of such words, of the meaning of them, and that I did indeed think before I put them down. I am not eight years old, you are not my mother, and “fuck” is just a word.
What are your thoughts? Agree, or disagree? Why?