At first, I was going to tell you all about my family life. But then I realized, you have your own, and you don’t need to read five hundred words of me talking about me to understand what I want to say today.
All you need to know is that I go to church, and my parents don’t like it. So they make it hard for me.
I haven’t been to church in the past couple of weeks because I had no way to get there. I’m not allowed to drive there, and I no longer can afford a bus pass. When I spoke to my friends, they told me trite things like, “You’ll find a way” and “God provides”. But I was sad and lonely. I haven’t had the chance to attend a good worship session in over a month. I feel like I’ve lost touch with God, and so I didn’t believe my friends when they used such cliché sayings.
But cliché is cliché for one reason: it works.
God does provide. And this is the first time I’ve truly witnessed it in my own life. It’s the first time I’ve needed Him in this manner. And I should have had faith that He would come through for me – but even though I didn’t, that didn’t stop Him from working His way into my situation.
Friends of mine, a couple who are just about three months pregnant, and absolutely lovely, offered to pay for my bus pass for the month of February. That’s $118.00; not exactly chump change. But they claimed that “God has blessed [them] in so many ways, and [they] want to bless [me].”
My first reaction was the ugly rearing of my pride: Oh no, no way. No, no, no. But another of my friends, who’d overheard the conversation, wrapped her arm around my shoulders and told me, “This is how the church works. We help when you’re in need. God is providing a way for you to come to church because you need to be here. Take it.”
How can I refuse that? Who am I to refuse such a gift? My next reaction was, “When I have decent job, I’ll-” I wasn’t even allowed to finish. Not a question that I pay them back when I can. Just take it, Kat. Let us help you.
Next came the tears, rising up the back of my throat, stinging my nose and making my lips tremble. Before I completely embarrassed myself, I wrapped Ale in a hug that was meant to express some of my gratitude. I murmured my thanks in her ear. I looked up at her husband and thanked him. I didn’t know what else to do.
And when I drove home, I let loose a few of those tears, and whispered my thanks into the ear of God, and tried to show Him just how sincerely grateful I was that He is there to provide for me. For us. For everyone – if only we ask. And sometimes, even when we won’t.